The definition of humility is often explained as someone who thinks of themselves as lowly and insignificant. Someone who will always put others before himself, and possibly someone who is seen as meek and timid. But this is not the correct definition of humility from the Jewish approach. I have two proofs for this, one I think is well known and the other is a little less well known.
The first is a Gemara at the end of מסכת סוטה. The Gemara there explains that as certain great people died, the character traits that they personified left the world with them. It says that when R’ Meir died the ability to capture an idea with a parable disappeared, when R’ Akiva died the honor for Torah went with him, when R’ Yehuda Hanasi died humility went with him, and the list includes others with their traits as well. But R’ Yosef says to the תנא that quotes this ברייתא to exclude the line about humility since he is still alive, and he is truly humble. Now obviously, the definition that we used for humility would not work at all in this context. Someone who sees himself as small would never be able to stand up and claim humility for himself, it is an oxymoronic statement of the highest order.
The second proof comes from this past week’s parsha which we all read in our homes to ourselves. We all saw that there is a little aleph (ויקרא) in the first word of this past week’s parsha, and Rashi explains that this is so the word ויקרא could possibly be read as ויקר which means and Hashem happened to speak to Moshe as opposed to Hashem specifically calling Moshe. He says that this was Moshe’s request since he was such an עניו, since he was so humble. We read this Rashi and are all fine with it, but if we think about it, Rashi got this from his Rebbe who got it from his Rebbe, all the way back until Moshe Rabbeinu was teaching the Torah to the Jews and when they get to Parshas Vayikra you can imagine the Jew in the back who raises his hand and asks Moshe “why is the aleph little?” and Moshe clears his throat and says, “well you see, I am very humble and I didn’t want it to seem like Hashem was calling me specifically so I requested from the Creator of the universe with Whom I speak directly that he put a small aleph there…” you see the problem now? Moshe transmitted the Torah to the nation, so he needed to proclaim his humility for all to hear, which presents an issue with equating humility with timidness.
How then do we understand this character trait which is so highly extolled by our sages?
In past years I understood that the definition of humility is seeing that everything comes from Hashem. When attribute everything that we have to our Father in heaven we are seeing ourselves as small, and we can also carry much more in this world since there is a power above us that we are directly connected to. There was only one problem with this. There is a Gemara in גיטין which is discussing the destruction of the second בית המקדש and in the story of קמצא and בר קמצא the Gemara relays that בר קמצא brought a sacrifice from the Romans to the בית המקדש which he had blemished on the lip which according to Jewish law disqualified the animal but according to Roman tradition did not, so we would not have an adequate excuse for the Roman authorities if we did not bring this sacrifice. The Rabbis discussed what to do and came up with two options, either we bring the קרבן despite the blemish, or we don’t bring the animal as a קרבן and we kill בר קמצא so the government never finds out that we didn’t bring it. But there was someone there, R’ Zechariah Ben Avkulus who negated both of those possibilities using the typical rules of how we handle halachic questions. We are usually very concerned that someone watching from the outside will see us circumventing halacha and will assume that this is the actual halacha and not a temporary ruling. R’ Zechariah was concerned that if we brought the קרבן people would thing that a damaged lip was not a blemish and would possibly bring such a קרבן in the future. And if we kill בר קמצא then people might come to think that someone who blemishes a קרבן needs to be put to death, and that could possibly lead to the unnecessary loss of life in the future. Since he was using the standard rules applied to halachic ruling the Rabbis listened to him, sat by and בר קמצא returned the news to the Romans who sent Titus to destroy the בית המקדש. And the Gemara says that it was the humility (ענוותנותו) of R’ Zechariah that in some way led to the destruction of our בית המקדש.
This story always posed a big question to my understanding of humility, because why would understanding that everything comes from Hashem cause someone to allow בר קמצא who is trying to destroy the בית המקדש get away with it?
I think what we are currently going through highlights the missing ingredient which we need to successfully understand what humility is.
If there is anything that this coronavirus and quarantine period has taught me it is that Hashem is completely in control of this world and all worlds. Usually we can use something from our arsenal to handle crisis. After 9/11 we used war and weapons that we had developed to ultimately bring those responsible to justice. We can usually use the justice system, political forces, economic wealth, fame, physical strength to either break through or avoid the full effects of a crisis. But this virus has robbed us of our illusions of control. This microscopic organism is attacking politicians and civilians alike, the physically strong are getting ravaged by it in some cases as heavily as the feeble, and weapons are useless against it. The scientists are working tirelessly but so far to no avail. Something with no mind has managed to collapse our global economies, exhaust our medical infrastructure and send the world in an unprecedented shutdown.
But as God fearing people we see through the virus and understand that Hashem is speaking to us, pulling the rug out from under our feet so to speak and showing us that our controls in the world were all smoke screens all along. This will end when Hashem wills it to end.
I think that control is the concept needed to define humility. A truly humble person knows that they don’t have any control in the world, but as is typical in the Jewish way of way of life, they can paradoxically exert the most extreme force and control in the world using the imaginary ropes that Hashem has given us. To explain: Hashem doesn’t run our world Himself, He has certain messengers, namely gravity, physics, economics, money, fame, and many others. And Hashem expects up to operate fully within those confines while understanding on the deepest level that they are all mirages and masks that hide His presence from the world. Therefore, a humble person needs to walk a tightrope, and they need to understand that everything that happens comes from Hashem, but they also need to be responsible and live within the world that Hashem created for us. You can’t run into the middle of a busy intersection and say, “I believe that Hashem runs the world and I will be ok if He wants me to be”, because Hashem wants us to live in this world and use those imaginary controls while knowing that they are imaginary. But, there is a caveat, because we know that it is truly Hashem running the entire world, we can sometimes have the confidence to break the rules when it is necessary since Hashem is the rules and we have a direct relationship with Hashem, therefore we can bypass those rules when needed.
R’ Zechariah ben Avkulus was technically correct in his approach to dealing with בר קמצא since he was using the rules that Hashem gave us, but he lacked the vision that there are times when control needs to be exerted in a more serious way and leaders need to have the ability to go out on a limb and break the rules. He used too much humility then and was living too much in the confines of the rules and wasn’t able to break out from that mindset even though it was temporarily appropriate despite the risks that it presented, in order to save the בית המקדש.
A truly humble person can understand that every gift that they have comes from Hashem, and that without Hashem pulling the levers they would cease to exist, so they won’t take credit for themselves. They will live completely within the laws of physics while understanding that physics is nothing more than the name that scientists came up with for how Hashem runs our world and understands that physics has no power of its own. But simultaneously they can see through the masks and know that they have a direct line to Hashem which allows them to exert the maximum necessary control in the world that Hashem has given us.
May Hashem will this terrible time to end soon and allow the world to see that our world is operated by Hashem.